Making friends on Bumble For Friends isn’t quite the same as making friends at college or at work. But even without a mutual connection to introduce you or a shared setting to help inform the conversation, there are plenty of other ways you can kick off the chat. Remember: as you can only swipe on the profiles of folks who are the same gender as you on BFF, either person can make the first move! To help break the ice, here are our top tips for sending the first message to your potential new bestie.

Mention your mutual interests

A great friendship is often built around enjoying the things you love together, so take a look at their profile and see if there’s anything you have in common that can spark the conversation. Maybe you recognize your favorite bar in one of their photos, or you see that your zodiac signs are compatible! Read through their Interest Badges to see if they match any of yours, and don’t forget to check the bottom of their profile to see if they’ve connected their Spotify account. You just know that if you have a top artist in common then a friend date to a karaoke bar is on the cards!

Reference one of their Life Badges

On Bumble For Friends, you can choose up to three Badges related to milestones (think: new parent, house hunting, getting a degree, discovering their gender identity). Big topics like this can shape a person’s day-to-day life and the type of platonic connections they’re looking for, so they can be really great common ground for bonding. If any of their Life Badges match with yours, try opening the conversation by saying that you’ve been through (or are currently going) through a similar experience. As long as you feel comfortable, being open and vulnerable in this way from the beginning can help you skip the small talk and deepen the connection with your new match.

Come up with a compliment 

Just like in real life, a respectful compliment can be a great way to kick off a conversation. But remember, you don’t want to come off as flirty (save that for Date Mode!), so try to keep your message light and fun. Was it their sense of style that caught your eye? Let them know! Then follow up by asking about their favorite clothing shops or brands. If you think the pup they’re pictured with is adorable, start the chat by asking what the dog’s name is. If you’re still wondering what to compliment them on, perhaps it’s their Profile Prompts, music taste, bio, or anything else on their profile that you admire.

Try one of these conversation starters 

Sometimes, it really is as simple as saying hello and mentioning what it is you’re hoping to find on Bumble BFF. If you’re still not sure what to chat about yet, try one of these easy opening lines and see where it goes!

• Hey! I just moved here and I can see from your profile that you’re a local. What are your top three recs of things to do in the city?
• Now that it’s getting warmer, I need to find someone who’s down for a picnic at the local park. Want to get a group together?
• Omg—I’m job hunting too! Let’s grab coffee and motivate each other to fill out applications!
• It’s great to match with a fellow new parent! How are you holding up?
• It’s awesome to see that you’re sober. Congratulations! I’m sober-curious myself—I’d love to chat to you more about your experience, if you’re game! 

Be yourself

It can be nerve-wracking to put yourself out there to find friends online, but remember, anyone actively swiping on Bumble For Friends is likely here to make new pals too. If someone is being intentional about making friends, they’re probably going to be excited that you started a conversation.

Friendships can blossom from so many different first encounters, so try not to overthink it! Start simple and be proud of making the first move. Your kind of people will gravitate toward you, so send that message and see what happens. You never know who’s going to become your next bestie.