What My First Girl Date Taught Me
When Mason and I matched on Bumble BFF, we were both quick to acknowledge how simultaneously strange and not strange it was.
It was strange in the sense that human beings don’t tend to be so upfront so quickly about how they feel about each other, but not strange in that we were both at a place in life where we were lacking good gal pals. Bumble BFF was the best way we both found to connect with other women for platonic relationships.
Neither of us were very keen on the pre-meet up small talk, so we got to the point fairly quickly: Coffee on Friday?
I got ready on Friday afternoon as if I were getting ready for a 10th date, not a first. I chose a casual outfit, but threw my favorite high-waisted fringe jeans into the mix; I was confident she would appreciate them in the way only other women can.
I got to the coffee shop first and surveyed the room for a table that had enough space around it so people nearby wouldn’t overhear as we were trying to get to know one another. I ordered a coffee, took a seat, and waited.
When Mason walked in we immediately recognized each other.
“Should we hug it out?” she asked, shrugging her shoulders and smiling.
“Probably. That feels more appropriate than a handshake, right?”
We hugged, and giggled, and it felt as though we already knew each other. That hug melted away any worries that the next hour would be anything other than fun.
We started with the basics: Where are you from, where’d you go to school, what do you do, what's your family like? We talked about love, what we really wanted to do with our careers, what we really wanted to do with our lives, and how to negotiate the three.
We talked about why we were on Bumble BFF: friends moving out of town, wanting someone to go on girl dates with, craving more female energy, craving more female connection.
When you exchange numbers at the end of a platonic girl date, there isn’t any anxiety over who will text who first or how long the other person should wait to respond. There’s just the high of knowing that a new, authentic connection has been made, one without any potential for heartbreak.
Something truly special is created when two women carve out space in their lives to form a bond without judgment or fear. It definitely requires a good amount of reminding yourself to relax and not overthink, but if there’s one thing I learned from my very first girl date it’s that it’s always, always worth it to take the leap.