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Modern Dating Definitions You Need to Know

The dating landscape evolves quickly. To help all of our bees keep up with the latest terms and phrases, we’ve created a pocket dictionary for modern dating. How many of these words do you know?

Disclaimer: We don’t encourage you to do most of these things – they’re mean! Don’t be with anyone who does these things to you either. We’re just trying to help you navigate the wild, wild world of dating.

Bad Pancake (n): Used to describe the first person you date after a breakup, the bad pancake is someone you don’t see a future with whom you use to test the waters of dating again. 

Benching (v): Also known as putting someone on the “back burner,” the bench is where you put someone just in case you want to pick up and start dating them more seriously again. It’s the human equivalent of the Maybe Pile when you’re cleaning out your closet. 

Blizzard Buddy (n): Someone you develop a romantic relationship with specifically for the purpose of not having to ride out a big weather event by yourself.

Breadcrumbing (v): The act of sending flirtatious, sporadic, and non-committal text messages to a romantic interest in order to keep the interest alive without expending any effort. 

Catfishing (v): Presenting a false version of yourself online, either with fake or heavily doctored photos or false profile information, in order to lure someone into dating you. (We have photo verification on Bumble to prevent this!)

Cuffing Season (n): Starting in the early fall, this is the time of year when singles want to partner up and settle down so they have someone to hang out with during the cold, mostly indoor months of winter.

Cushioning (v): When you have one main squeeze you’re dating, but perhaps you’re not sure about the relationship so you have several “cushions,” or other romantic prospects in case it doesn’t work out.

Deeplike (v): When you go way back in someone’s social media history on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter and “like” something from a long time ago in order to let them know you’re thinking of them. This can alternatively be when you mistakenly like something from 2012 on someone’s Instagram and immediately wish there was a back button for real life.

DTR (v): Define the Relationship. This is when you and the person you’re in a situationship with have what was previously known as “The Talk” about what you’re actually doing together.

Ghosting (v): When someone disappears out of a relationship without a word. They suddenly stop responding to texts and calls and you never hear from them again. Check out our full guide to ghosting here.

Haunting (v): When someone who ghosted you in the past suddenly comes back into your life, usually with a random text or a like on Instagram.

Instaficial (n): When you post the first picture of you and your significant other on Instagram, letting the world know you’re official.

Monkeying (v): In the same way that monkeys swing from branch to branch without touching the ground, someone who goes from relationship to relationship with no downtime in between is said to be monkeying.

Netflix and Chill (n): When you invite someone over to Netflix and Chill, there’s the implication that you won’t actually be watching that new series or movie.

On A Thing (n): When you’re in a romantic relationship that’s not quite official but not exactly casual, you might say you’re on a thing.

Pen Pal (n): A person with whom you text or message frequently but hardly ever see in real life.

Situationship (n): Are you in a romantic “relationship” that doesn’t have a label and can’t quite be defined? That’s a situationship. See also: “On a thing”.

Slow Fade (n): A way to passive-aggressively break up with someone by gradually removing yourself from their life in subtle stages.

Tuning (v): How you act during the flirtatious and not-quite-serious stage of getting to know someone before an official romantic relationship begins.

Now that you’re fluent, watch out for people who do these things!